Quiz
What was your score?
Me - I got an 83%. (10/12).
7.18.2008
Today's actions dictate future outcomes.
Your present is your future if you don't start changing who you are and how you act NOW.
When was that last time you were touched?
With tenderness with no hidden motives? Apparently, it's been a while. I found this article to be so on point. Here is one line from it:
A refrain I hear frequently from female friends and clients is that once the sexual passion has waned, affectionate touch goes out of the window too. “I can't give him a simple cuddle without him thinking I want sex!” women moan. That's because he learnt not to have “emotional” hugs long ago. So when a woman offers him one, he thinks she's signalling full-on passion.
7.17.2008
Date
Me have a date tomorrow. Ehhh - I should be excited. But I've been out with this guy 3-4 different times. He is so attractive to me. Got a brain (Engineer PhD candidate), got passion (volunteers heavily in the Obama campaign). But our chemistry is like vinegar and water.
I tease him because he's like a middle schooler. When we hug, it's assess out. I'm not saying I want him to cop a cup o' A&T....but an embrace would be nice. And he's still in school, and used to a school schedule...so sometimes he calls or pings me and invites me over after hours. I've had to check him on that...might work for his 'school-mates," but I'm not driving $4.05 25 minutes to see him after 10 pm. In grown folk speak that is a booty call. I've explicitly told him not to invite me over and/or out during booty-call hours.
So finally, he took the hard hint. He invited me on a swanky date (art + music) early in the evening.
I tease him because he's like a middle schooler. When we hug, it's assess out. I'm not saying I want him to cop a cup o' A&T....but an embrace would be nice. And he's still in school, and used to a school schedule...so sometimes he calls or pings me and invites me over after hours. I've had to check him on that...might work for his 'school-mates," but I'm not driving
So finally, he took the hard hint. He invited me on a swanky date (art + music) early in the evening.
How in Tarnation
Is McCain chipping away at Obama's lead?
If you are a self-respecting woman...you would not entrust the this country to McCain. (Please, I welcome you to debate this opinion of mine).
Perhaps if you WOULD entrust this country to him, you'd also allow your daughter to...
Marry a man that left his previous wife after a terrible accident (this is the reason that McCain's relationship with the Reagans was damaged)
Left his wife for a rich WASPY chic who funded his dream of being the most powerful country in the world
Called his rich WASPY wife a trollup and a cunt
Makes jokes about rape
Read Here. Again, I invite a woman to tell me why she'd vote for him. I mean really, I'd rather you just not vote at all (and then move to Canada or Mexico).
If you are a self-respecting woman...you would not entrust the this country to McCain. (Please, I welcome you to debate this opinion of mine).
Perhaps if you WOULD entrust this country to him, you'd also allow your daughter to...
Marry a man that left his previous wife after a terrible accident (this is the reason that McCain's relationship with the Reagans was damaged)
Left his wife for a rich WASPY chic who funded his dream of being the most powerful country in the world
Called his rich WASPY wife a trollup and a cunt
Makes jokes about rape
Read Here. Again, I invite a woman to tell me why she'd vote for him. I mean really, I'd rather you just not vote at all (and then move to Canada or Mexico).
Correct me if I'm wrong.
Catholicism doesn't really work when you're sexually active prior to marriage.
Like, if you are laying down with a person that you don't want to have a child with, but don't believe in birth control/abortion...you are essentially asking for a child out of wedlock, no?
Like, if you are laying down with a person that you don't want to have a child with, but don't believe in birth control/abortion...you are essentially asking for a child out of wedlock, no?
LOA - Actualization #3
I'm taking this laws of attraction thing SO Seriously. I'm not taking actual count of the number of times I've asked for something and it materialized before my eyes, but I've got a handful of examples already.
This past weekend I created a Vision Board. Essentially, I have several affirmations on it and personal statements / pictures of what I excpect from my future. Also this week, CreoleInDC had a topic that is very in line with my focus right now: What's Your Plan Man: Asking where do you see yourself in 5 years. My response is below...
@ Age 32:
Personally: I am married and have started having children. We live an active lifestyle, and travel at least annually. We live in a comfortably nice home and are active in the community. We recycle. We visit family often.
Professionally: I'm in my 3rd position at my current Company, making at least $100,000. I am also serving on one Board of a NFP.
*Thanks for posting, need to put this on my Vision Board*
So on the professional tip - I identified a woman that is very successful and has had a career path that I envision myself having...and I'm not going to speculate how much she makes; however, I'm sure that it's well above my 6 figure goal. As the laws of attractions recommends...when you ask or specify what you want...the next step is to receive and act as if you already have it. On the elevator to get my breakfast (Two boiled eggs and a coffee); I reminded myself of her.
Who the heck do I see in the cafe? HER. My mind began going in overdrive, knowing that I had to put my desire out into the Universe. To let her know my intent. So like the dork that I am I approached her and said, "Hi Hero, I'd like to build a relationship with you. I look at your career path and I'd like to understand how you got to where you are because I'd like to take a similar path."
I'm on her Calendar for lunch in a few weeks! Yea, for me asking, believing and making action to receive!
This stuff really works y'all. Don't sleep on it.
This past weekend I created a Vision Board. Essentially, I have several affirmations on it and personal statements / pictures of what I excpect from my future. Also this week, CreoleInDC had a topic that is very in line with my focus right now: What's Your Plan Man: Asking where do you see yourself in 5 years. My response is below...
@ Age 32:
Personally: I am married and have started having children. We live an active lifestyle, and travel at least annually. We live in a comfortably nice home and are active in the community. We recycle. We visit family often.
Professionally: I'm in my 3rd position at my current Company, making at least $100,000. I am also serving on one Board of a NFP.
*Thanks for posting, need to put this on my Vision Board*
So on the professional tip - I identified a woman that is very successful and has had a career path that I envision myself having...and I'm not going to speculate how much she makes; however, I'm sure that it's well above my 6 figure goal. As the laws of attractions recommends...when you ask or specify what you want...the next step is to receive and act as if you already have it. On the elevator to get my breakfast (Two boiled eggs and a coffee); I reminded myself of her.
Who the heck do I see in the cafe? HER. My mind began going in overdrive, knowing that I had to put my desire out into the Universe. To let her know my intent. So like the dork that I am I approached her and said, "Hi Hero, I'd like to build a relationship with you. I look at your career path and I'd like to understand how you got to where you are because I'd like to take a similar path."
I'm on her Calendar for lunch in a few weeks! Yea, for me asking, believing and making action to receive!
This stuff really works y'all. Don't sleep on it.
7.14.2008
Chew on this...
During the days of slavery a black child was more likely to grow up living with both parents than he or she is today. ~ The Abolition of Marriage, by Maggie Gallagher
7.13.2008
Teachers: Do you buy your own classroom supplies?"
If so, about how much do you spend?
Do you get state issued gift cards? Are you reimbursed otherwise?
Are your students at a disadvantage because you don't spend as much as you'd like to spend?
How do you purchase supplies: Online or at the store?
PLEASE Comment (if you're not a teacher, ask a friend who is a teacher and report back!)
An idea of giving was born in my head...I need data to make it a reality!
Do you get state issued gift cards? Are you reimbursed otherwise?
Are your students at a disadvantage because you don't spend as much as you'd like to spend?
How do you purchase supplies: Online or at the store?
PLEASE Comment (if you're not a teacher, ask a friend who is a teacher and report back!)
An idea of giving was born in my head...I need data to make it a reality!
What are you grateful / thankful for?
A happy post. Let the positive energy get ya!
Grateful for waking up and finishing my book
Grateful for the friendship I've developed with somebody new.
Grateful that I am able to gift my friend a free trip to Miami.
Grateful for winning my kickball yesterday!
Grateful for waking up and finishing my book
Grateful for the friendship I've developed with somebody new.
Grateful that I am able to gift my friend a free trip to Miami.
Grateful for winning my kickball yesterday!
Timing & effort turns f.uck into love.
Last night I spent about $800 on things that I need to in order to live up to my commitment to be a Maid of Honor in my best friends wedding. In the process, I was online with my BFF and we were trying to find flights, and share other ideas. At some point I say what I've been focused on as of late. The desire for a fulfilling relationship that will lead me to follow in her footsteps of marriage.
Immediately she asked what type of guy I want. Lol, she then started sending me profiles of guys that fit the loose description on match.com. Hey, I've got to appreciate her creativity. So then I realized that immediately after I broke up with 2-year man, I had created a match.com profile. At some point when 2-year man and I got back together, I deleted the profile. But when I went to match.com, my old user name was pre-populated in the log-in. I reactivated my account. Mind you, I haven't yet paid for the services. So this is like going inside of your favorite department store and forgetting all of your credit/debit cards. You see what you might want take home; however, you need the money.
But then I got a little curious. Another friend recently signed up on e-harmony. So I went over there. Let me tell you, filling out that profile is something arduous. But you know what - it should be. It takes you through no less than 200 questions that let complex computer logarithms identify who you are and who will receive you well. After going through the questions, it provides you with a "report," and lists matches. Mind you...not having paid for the service, I can't even see pictures.
bear with me, I haven't even gotten to the point, but I'm discovering a few other points as I purge these thoughts .
So my personality profile categorized me as, "Agreeable taking care of others or taking care of yourself." And of course, as I read the description, I was like, yep that's me...those 200 questions and the complex computer logarithm shits me not. Then I went on to read the profile of 5 initial matches.
You realize that the type of people you attract is a reflection of who you are, right? So if you ever question what's wrong with the people that God's put in your life, the first place to look is the mirror. The benefit of putting out who you are on the computer is that the element of physical attraction is removed.
Physical attraction is perhaps one of the strongest initial forms of attraction. However, it's so fluid and easily morphed. Emotional/mental attraction; however, takes time to develop; and as long as you remain constant in what you want and who you are, what you are attracted to and what's attracted to you rarely chagne.
Most people that see me would imagine that I have no problem meeting people. I get cues from society that I'm generally attractive. Not a model by any means, but if I'm out, I'll without a doubt notice that people are appreciating what they see. But that honestly has been one of my biggest impediments to developing the type of relationship that I want. People often perceive me as sexual. Not just men, but I've even heard women say that I exude sexuality. I'll be frank...I've got a nice body. While I don't walk around letting it all hang out, I also don't wear a Bhurka hiding all that I've worked hard for and appreciate about my body. So I put out an era of confidence about my body, which attracts people to my body. For example, put a form fitting t-shirt on an A-cup woman...you might notice her smile. Put a form fitting t-shirt on a C-cup woman you notice her shape (boobs) first...then her smile.
However, if you read the blog...I don't have a preoccupation with appearance. I'm pretty entertained by political discussions and interactions with and observations of people. I'd like to attract a man with these similar interests/curiosities.
There is a lot that I value more than physical appearance; however, given that physical attraction is the strongest form of initial attraction (and men are visual creatures), they have a hard time getting past this and in turn put forth their desires regarding me. Which initially is not to know me, it's to fuck me. Yes I said fuck. Sex takes two general forms, fucking and making love. If you don't care to know me, you have absolutely no interest in making love to me...you'd simply like to fuck me.
So part of my trouble in relationships has been feeling comfortable with this attention, but using it to my advantage...and honestly letting time and genuine effort turn a man's desire to fuck me into a desire to make love to me. I'm not saying I jump in the sack on the first date, but let's be real, there is a long pathway between hello and I love you and who's to say when "the right time," to do that thing is. Clearly, I haven't gotten the right-time-thing quite figured out and what I've been doing thus far hasn't resulted in my desired outcome. Hence, I'm taking a vow of abstinence at least until the end of 2008.
Mind you, I'm not one to believe in abstinence until marriage...don't want an unpleasant surprise on my wedding night (actually it's deeper than that, for me to feel a complete connection with a person, I need to experience the trinity in them...mind body and soul. Leave one out of that equation and I wouldn't commit my life to a person until I got an understanding of all 3). And I think women like Joan on Girlfriends with a set "3-month" fail to realize that whether you do it after the first week or after 3 months...a dude will stay around whether he truly likes you or not to have sex. Matter of fact, he might take pride in himself for conquering your 3 month rule, but still not like you enough to love you.
this post has taken a complete different path of where I intended it to go. So I'll end it here and just post again.
Immediately she asked what type of guy I want. Lol, she then started sending me profiles of guys that fit the loose description on match.com. Hey, I've got to appreciate her creativity. So then I realized that immediately after I broke up with 2-year man, I had created a match.com profile. At some point when 2-year man and I got back together, I deleted the profile. But when I went to match.com, my old user name was pre-populated in the log-in. I reactivated my account. Mind you, I haven't yet paid for the services. So this is like going inside of your favorite department store and forgetting all of your credit/debit cards. You see what you might want take home; however, you need the money.
But then I got a little curious. Another friend recently signed up on e-harmony. So I went over there. Let me tell you, filling out that profile is something arduous. But you know what - it should be. It takes you through no less than 200 questions that let complex computer logarithms identify who you are and who will receive you well. After going through the questions, it provides you with a "report," and lists matches. Mind you...not having paid for the service, I can't even see pictures.
bear with me, I haven't even gotten to the point, but I'm discovering a few other points as I purge these thoughts .
So my personality profile categorized me as, "Agreeable taking care of others or taking care of yourself." And of course, as I read the description, I was like, yep that's me...those 200 questions and the complex computer logarithm shits me not. Then I went on to read the profile of 5 initial matches.
You realize that the type of people you attract is a reflection of who you are, right? So if you ever question what's wrong with the people that God's put in your life, the first place to look is the mirror. The benefit of putting out who you are on the computer is that the element of physical attraction is removed.
Physical attraction is perhaps one of the strongest initial forms of attraction. However, it's so fluid and easily morphed. Emotional/mental attraction; however, takes time to develop; and as long as you remain constant in what you want and who you are, what you are attracted to and what's attracted to you rarely chagne.
Most people that see me would imagine that I have no problem meeting people. I get cues from society that I'm generally attractive. Not a model by any means, but if I'm out, I'll without a doubt notice that people are appreciating what they see. But that honestly has been one of my biggest impediments to developing the type of relationship that I want. People often perceive me as sexual. Not just men, but I've even heard women say that I exude sexuality. I'll be frank...I've got a nice body. While I don't walk around letting it all hang out, I also don't wear a Bhurka hiding all that I've worked hard for and appreciate about my body. So I put out an era of confidence about my body, which attracts people to my body. For example, put a form fitting t-shirt on an A-cup woman...you might notice her smile. Put a form fitting t-shirt on a C-cup woman you notice her shape (boobs) first...then her smile.
However, if you read the blog...I don't have a preoccupation with appearance. I'm pretty entertained by political discussions and interactions with and observations of people. I'd like to attract a man with these similar interests/curiosities.
There is a lot that I value more than physical appearance; however, given that physical attraction is the strongest form of initial attraction (and men are visual creatures), they have a hard time getting past this and in turn put forth their desires regarding me. Which initially is not to know me, it's to fuck me. Yes I said fuck. Sex takes two general forms, fucking and making love. If you don't care to know me, you have absolutely no interest in making love to me...you'd simply like to fuck me.
So part of my trouble in relationships has been feeling comfortable with this attention, but using it to my advantage...and honestly letting time and genuine effort turn a man's desire to fuck me into a desire to make love to me. I'm not saying I jump in the sack on the first date, but let's be real, there is a long pathway between hello and I love you and who's to say when "the right time," to do that thing is. Clearly, I haven't gotten the right-time-thing quite figured out and what I've been doing thus far hasn't resulted in my desired outcome. Hence, I'm taking a vow of abstinence at least until the end of 2008.
Mind you, I'm not one to believe in abstinence until marriage...don't want an unpleasant surprise on my wedding night (actually it's deeper than that, for me to feel a complete connection with a person, I need to experience the trinity in them...mind body and soul. Leave one out of that equation and I wouldn't commit my life to a person until I got an understanding of all 3). And I think women like Joan on Girlfriends with a set "3-month" fail to realize that whether you do it after the first week or after 3 months...a dude will stay around whether he truly likes you or not to have sex. Matter of fact, he might take pride in himself for conquering your 3 month rule, but still not like you enough to love you.
this post has taken a complete different path of where I intended it to go. So I'll end it here and just post again.
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