I always thought of that as a terribly cliche pick-up line from the 70s. But really, what's your sign?
I'm more and more interested in learning about signs. Often times it describes a person's personality very accurately and allows you to have a greater understanding of who they are or strive to be. Check out Astrology-Online. Did your sign's description describe you accurately? Or perhaps your S/O, your friends?
Recently one of my "friends" said something very insensitive. In reading up on her sign I saw so many truths in how it described her. She's gossipy and often times I get bored with her conversation because it is limited to male/female relationships. To give a tangible example, when Tim Russert passed away she asked me, "Who is that?" Our conversation rarely strays from him/her/them and when it does stray, I initiate the conversation and she has no input.
I figure reading up a bit more on signs may allow me to better understand others!
7.12.2008
Insomniac thoughts
I can't sleep. Everytime I close my eyes my thoughts start to race to negativity. So as an alternative I've been net surfing.
The latest thought that has plagued me is current status of the relationship I have with my mother. She was much more pronounced in reaching out to me when she thought I was going to get married to old-dude. I feel as if she is disappointed in me because I'm not in a serious relationship. She's made those bullshit comments regarding wanting to be a grandmother. So maybe her way of dealing with her disappointment in my situation is by not talking to me as much as we used to.
Isn't that some bullshit.
The latest thought that has plagued me is current status of the relationship I have with my mother. She was much more pronounced in reaching out to me when she thought I was going to get married to old-dude. I feel as if she is disappointed in me because I'm not in a serious relationship. She's made those bullshit comments regarding wanting to be a grandmother. So maybe her way of dealing with her disappointment in my situation is by not talking to me as much as we used to.
Isn't that some bullshit.
7.11.2008
Yea or Nay?
A Lady knows to let a man lead...even when she knows that she could lead. Sometimes part of being a lady is letting your man lead and/or letting him think that he is leading.
Erica Badu is pregnant AGAIN, by another man.
*Rolls eyes* Sure I could mind my business and not have an opinion. But I do. My opinion is far bigger than "Erica". More power to her. Our lives don't intersect, so whatever judgment I have of her situation is pretty irrelevant. And I'll preface, my thoughts might piss you off and make you think that I'm close-minded or something else negative. We all bear that risk when we have an opinion...but I'm open to different perspectives.
One opinion that will never budge in my mind:
1) Raising a child in a two parent home is the optimal situation
Before folks get nilly willy with caveats. This is assuming that there is not an abusive situation present.
In life you have responsibilities. When single, you bear the burden (and reward to be fair) of all of those responsibilities. When married, you share those responsibilities. Add a child to that equation, and I cannot imagine that raising a child is easier alone than it would be with another person.
Furthermore, let's be real...most people don't choose to be single parents. They may choose not to wear protection and *hope* for the best. But when is the last time you heard a single woman announce that she is trying to get pregnant (the same way that married couples announce it). Single woman might say wants to have a baby ect, but rarely will one declare: I'm trying to get pregnant. (Also, my opinion doesn't address divorce situations).
So I had a dialogue about this on a message board. E.rica B.adu frequents the message board, as the purpose is primarily to discuss music etc. (But really, most of it is random people exchanging whateverthehell is on their minds). Apparently some posters commented on her being knocked up again by a different men. Yes, that's right, 3 different babies by 3 different men. She responds to their comments with a long dialogue talking about how she can support her kids, folks need to mind their business ect. Unfortunately, celebrities are in the spotlight. Folks would've been just as critical of an every-day woman who got knocked up by 3 different men.
So anyway despite my saying some knee-jerk-spark-a-fire type stuff, a lot of women on the message board were promoting the single-parent situation in defense of her. I'm not here to spark a pro-life/pro-choice debate, that is a deeply personal decision that I am nothing but lucky to have not to had to go through. It's more so on the front end prevention, and is something that I sometimes fail at. You are a single woman not taking every preventative measure to not get pregnant...and you are laying up with a man that doesn't value you enough to commit his life to you and help you to raise a family. THAT IS THE PROBLEM.
But, heck...maybe it's really not a problem and I'm being too harsh/close minded. And if I'm being to harsh/close-minded, try that advice out with your daughter. "Honey, it's okay to not use protection and lay-up with a man that doesn't value you enough to commit to you and/or support you."
sidebar, i always find it disturbing when a couple who is not going through fertility treatment announces that they are trying to get pregnant. Essentially they are telling you that they are having a lot of sex, particularly during a certain time of the month. That ain't my business...just tell me when you're pregnant!
Now Erica, probably has money and a lifestyle that probably allows her great flexibility in raising 3 children on her own. But for those of us 'regular' folk that have a daily job and either lose $/opportunity when we're not working (in the case of entrepreneurs) or must report to powers that be...you can't convince me that being a single parent is easier than sharing the responsibility with another person. You might be a GREAT parent, and will raise very successful children and be otherwise happy. But unless you've got an awesome support system (which would be ESSENTIAL)...I'm not convinced that it's easier. (again, argument isn't that it's wrong and can't be done...I'm just not convinced that single-parenthood is easier).
Also, while you love your children...if you remain single, how do your kids learn (and not just learn, but live and experience) what a respectful male/female relationship is like? (again, comparatively, this the 2-parent home situation assumes a non-abusive respectful relationship where love is demonstrated). I'm not saying it can't be done, but perhaps it'd be easier in a 2-parent home cuz we learn best by example.
Hmm, I just heard an interesting perspective that I never thought of: Perhaps the traditional model of a male/female two parent home is flawed. As a result in the laws of evolution, we are moving against the flawed paradigm to the more "perfect," paradigm.
Well if the "perfect paradigm" is that men plant their seed among several different women and women are to raise children alone....ehhh, that's a VERY scary unsettling concept.
I might be reaching here, so realize that I'm just on a free flow of thought based on what I observe, not based on empirical or even anecdotal evidence and not based on caveat examples of a rich super-star having 3 babies by 3 different men. Free flow thought also assumes that in the single parent situation more often than not it's the woman that bears the responsibility of the children...
Another aspect of this 70% of black children are being born into single parent homes is this perpetuation of the deterioration of family. Oh, perhaps the family is not deteriorating, it's simply that black people are far ahead of the curve and have begun this shift from the flawed family paradigm to the new 'perfect' family paradigm where a woman takes care of children while the man plants his seed all over the world. A person added that the deterioration of the family is a result of the lack of regard and respect for the black woman.
Well if you're a black man that was raised in a single parent home...
you may not have REALLY learned how to love/respect women. You may have feared your mother and saw her as an authority figure; however, you probably didn't see a man nurture and love her. So as an adult, you perceive *us* as authority figures, say that we suffer from ABW syndrom...yet still expect us to take care of you. You end up having a child, but are not married because it wasn't a part of your perception of family growing up. Cycle continues.
If you're a black woman that was raised in a single parent home...
you may have learned that a woman must do it all by herself and can do it pretty well, so really, a man is not necessary. You may want a man, but you KNOW he's know necessary. So as an adult, you're not really impressed by your counterpart...the black man that was raised in a single parent home. You end up having a child, but are not married because it wasn't a part of your perception of family growing up. Cycle continues.
I know I could be far off base with some of my opinions and recognize that I have a close-minded view. But because of my value system, which is based on how I grew up and what I was surrounded with / exposed to...I probably won't have 3 babies by 3 different men. *knocks on wood*
One opinion that will never budge in my mind:
1) Raising a child in a two parent home is the optimal situation
Before folks get nilly willy with caveats. This is assuming that there is not an abusive situation present.
In life you have responsibilities. When single, you bear the burden (and reward to be fair) of all of those responsibilities. When married, you share those responsibilities. Add a child to that equation, and I cannot imagine that raising a child is easier alone than it would be with another person.
Furthermore, let's be real...most people don't choose to be single parents. They may choose not to wear protection and *hope* for the best. But when is the last time you heard a single woman announce that she is trying to get pregnant (the same way that married couples announce it). Single woman might say wants to have a baby ect, but rarely will one declare: I'm trying to get pregnant. (Also, my opinion doesn't address divorce situations).
So I had a dialogue about this on a message board. E.rica B.adu frequents the message board, as the purpose is primarily to discuss music etc. (But really, most of it is random people exchanging whateverthehell is on their minds). Apparently some posters commented on her being knocked up again by a different men. Yes, that's right, 3 different babies by 3 different men. She responds to their comments with a long dialogue talking about how she can support her kids, folks need to mind their business ect. Unfortunately, celebrities are in the spotlight. Folks would've been just as critical of an every-day woman who got knocked up by 3 different men.
So anyway despite my saying some knee-jerk-spark-a-fire type stuff, a lot of women on the message board were promoting the single-parent situation in defense of her. I'm not here to spark a pro-life/pro-choice debate, that is a deeply personal decision that I am nothing but lucky to have not to had to go through. It's more so on the front end prevention, and is something that I sometimes fail at. You are a single woman not taking every preventative measure to not get pregnant...and you are laying up with a man that doesn't value you enough to commit his life to you and help you to raise a family. THAT IS THE PROBLEM.
But, heck...maybe it's really not a problem and I'm being too harsh/close minded. And if I'm being to harsh/close-minded, try that advice out with your daughter. "Honey, it's okay to not use protection and lay-up with a man that doesn't value you enough to commit to you and/or support you."
sidebar, i always find it disturbing when a couple who is not going through fertility treatment announces that they are trying to get pregnant. Essentially they are telling you that they are having a lot of sex, particularly during a certain time of the month. That ain't my business...just tell me when you're pregnant!
Now Erica, probably has money and a lifestyle that probably allows her great flexibility in raising 3 children on her own. But for those of us 'regular' folk that have a daily job and either lose $/opportunity when we're not working (in the case of entrepreneurs) or must report to powers that be...you can't convince me that being a single parent is easier than sharing the responsibility with another person. You might be a GREAT parent, and will raise very successful children and be otherwise happy. But unless you've got an awesome support system (which would be ESSENTIAL)...I'm not convinced that it's easier. (again, argument isn't that it's wrong and can't be done...I'm just not convinced that single-parenthood is easier).
Also, while you love your children...if you remain single, how do your kids learn (and not just learn, but live and experience) what a respectful male/female relationship is like? (again, comparatively, this the 2-parent home situation assumes a non-abusive respectful relationship where love is demonstrated). I'm not saying it can't be done, but perhaps it'd be easier in a 2-parent home cuz we learn best by example.
Hmm, I just heard an interesting perspective that I never thought of: Perhaps the traditional model of a male/female two parent home is flawed. As a result in the laws of evolution, we are moving against the flawed paradigm to the more "perfect," paradigm.
Well if the "perfect paradigm" is that men plant their seed among several different women and women are to raise children alone....ehhh, that's a VERY scary unsettling concept.
I might be reaching here, so realize that I'm just on a free flow of thought based on what I observe, not based on empirical or even anecdotal evidence and not based on caveat examples of a rich super-star having 3 babies by 3 different men. Free flow thought also assumes that in the single parent situation more often than not it's the woman that bears the responsibility of the children...
Another aspect of this 70% of black children are being born into single parent homes is this perpetuation of the deterioration of family. Oh, perhaps the family is not deteriorating, it's simply that black people are far ahead of the curve and have begun this shift from the flawed family paradigm to the new 'perfect' family paradigm where a woman takes care of children while the man plants his seed all over the world. A person added that the deterioration of the family is a result of the lack of regard and respect for the black woman.
Well if you're a black man that was raised in a single parent home...
you may not have REALLY learned how to love/respect women. You may have feared your mother and saw her as an authority figure; however, you probably didn't see a man nurture and love her. So as an adult, you perceive *us* as authority figures, say that we suffer from ABW syndrom...yet still expect us to take care of you. You end up having a child, but are not married because it wasn't a part of your perception of family growing up. Cycle continues.
If you're a black woman that was raised in a single parent home...
you may have learned that a woman must do it all by herself and can do it pretty well, so really, a man is not necessary. You may want a man, but you KNOW he's know necessary. So as an adult, you're not really impressed by your counterpart...the black man that was raised in a single parent home. You end up having a child, but are not married because it wasn't a part of your perception of family growing up. Cycle continues.
I know I could be far off base with some of my opinions and recognize that I have a close-minded view. But because of my value system, which is based on how I grew up and what I was surrounded with / exposed to...I probably won't have 3 babies by 3 different men. *knocks on wood*
7.10.2008
It's easy - do something
Our country is facing a possible sharp economic downturn because of skyrocketing oil and fuel prices, but by pulling together, we can all do something to help now.
For airlines, ultra-expensive fuel means thousands of lost jobs and severe reductions in air service to both large and small communities. To the broader economy, oil prices mean slower activity and widespread economic pain. This pain can be alleviated, and that is why we are taking the extraordinary step of writing this joint letter to our customers.
Since high oil prices are partly a response to normal market forces, the nation needs to focus on increased energy supplies and conservation. However, there is another side to this story because normal market forces are being dangerously amplified by poorly regulated market speculation.
Twenty years ago, 21 percent of oil contracts were purchased by speculators who trade oil on paper with no intention of ever taking delivery. Today, oil speculators purchase 66 percent of all oil futures contracts, and that reflects just the transactions that are known. Speculators buy up large amounts of oil and then sell it to each other again and again. A barrel of oil may trade 20-plus times before it is delivered and used; the price goes up with each trade and consumers pick up the final tab. Some market experts estimate that current prices reflect as much as $30 to $60 per barrel in unnecessary speculative costs.
Over seventy years ago, Congress established regulations to control excessive, largely unchecked market speculation and manipulation. However, over the past two decades, these regulatory limits have been weakened or removed. We believe that restoring and enforcing these limits, along with several other modest measures, will provide more disclosure, transparency and sound market oversight. Together, these reforms will help cool the over-heated oil market and permit the economy to prosper.
The nation needs to pull together to reform the oil markets and solve this growing problem.
We need your help. Get more information and contact Congress by visiting Stop Oil Speculation Now
For airlines, ultra-expensive fuel means thousands of lost jobs and severe reductions in air service to both large and small communities. To the broader economy, oil prices mean slower activity and widespread economic pain. This pain can be alleviated, and that is why we are taking the extraordinary step of writing this joint letter to our customers.
Since high oil prices are partly a response to normal market forces, the nation needs to focus on increased energy supplies and conservation. However, there is another side to this story because normal market forces are being dangerously amplified by poorly regulated market speculation.
Twenty years ago, 21 percent of oil contracts were purchased by speculators who trade oil on paper with no intention of ever taking delivery. Today, oil speculators purchase 66 percent of all oil futures contracts, and that reflects just the transactions that are known. Speculators buy up large amounts of oil and then sell it to each other again and again. A barrel of oil may trade 20-plus times before it is delivered and used; the price goes up with each trade and consumers pick up the final tab. Some market experts estimate that current prices reflect as much as $30 to $60 per barrel in unnecessary speculative costs.
Over seventy years ago, Congress established regulations to control excessive, largely unchecked market speculation and manipulation. However, over the past two decades, these regulatory limits have been weakened or removed. We believe that restoring and enforcing these limits, along with several other modest measures, will provide more disclosure, transparency and sound market oversight. Together, these reforms will help cool the over-heated oil market and permit the economy to prosper.
The nation needs to pull together to reform the oil markets and solve this growing problem.
We need your help. Get more information and contact Congress by visiting Stop Oil Speculation Now
Shake My Head, Damn McCain.
This is just comical now. Every time I visit huffingtonpost.com, I really do laugh out loud at the latest asinine comment made by McCain or one of his advisors.
First there was McCain's comment in response to the question about how exports to Iran have increased exponentially during Bush's era. His response...well if cigarettes are being sent, at least the Iranian people are being killed off slowly. Yes they are enemy but folks have to realize that not every smoking person in the USA is as dumb/stupid as the Bush Administration. In turn not every smoking person in Iran is as dumb/stupid as Iranian leaders. You don't wish cancer or make light of it in that context.
Next, his economic advisor says that were are merely in a mental economic recession and that Americans are whiners. I'll say that everything is relative and we have it pretty good over here; however, not being able to pay for gas to get to work to feed your kids is kinda-sorta-in-my-opinion an okay thing to complain about.
Click on the active link in this sentence for the 10 things that should've ended McCain's chances for presidency this week. McCain mess ups.
First there was McCain's comment in response to the question about how exports to Iran have increased exponentially during Bush's era. His response...well if cigarettes are being sent, at least the Iranian people are being killed off slowly. Yes they are enemy but folks have to realize that not every smoking person in the USA is as dumb/stupid as the Bush Administration. In turn not every smoking person in Iran is as dumb/stupid as Iranian leaders. You don't wish cancer or make light of it in that context.
Next, his economic advisor says that were are merely in a mental economic recession and that Americans are whiners. I'll say that everything is relative and we have it pretty good over here; however, not being able to pay for gas to get to work to feed your kids is kinda-sorta-in-my-opinion an okay thing to complain about.
Click on the active link in this sentence for the 10 things that should've ended McCain's chances for presidency this week. McCain mess ups.
Random question - no snark, just curiosity
If you are / were a jehova witness...why aren't you supposed to vote? I heard about that today and I didn't understand the reasoning why.
Would this election year trump this rule? (Actually, I've been told refraining from voting is not a rule; however, it's highly discouraged).
Lmao - i posted this on my favorite msg board and one reply was:
Are you saying that I could actually hide from JW's at a voting center?
call a spade a spade...that mess was funny, even if it wasn't PC.
Would this election year trump this rule? (Actually, I've been told refraining from voting is not a rule; however, it's highly discouraged).
Lmao - i posted this on my favorite msg board and one reply was:
Are you saying that I could actually hide from JW's at a voting center?
call a spade a spade...that mess was funny, even if it wasn't PC.
7.09.2008
Whose Nuts Would You Like to Cut Off?
Maybe the dude that sexually assaulted me. Yeah, that's about it.
Apparently Jesse Jackson would like to cut Barack Obama's nuts off. Because you know, Obama is really a bad man, right? Jesse...sorry bro...it's a wrap for you. You LOST ALL of my respect. We've got the first valid, AWESOME amazing non-WASP (mixed) person that has a good shot at being president and you want to cut his nuts off. GTFOHWTBS. Seriously. No, SERIOUSLY. Move to another country, your services are no longer needed here.
I don't use this word often. But Jesse sounded like a real Nigger right there. "massa talkin' dohn to da popl on da fahm, i'mma go cut 'es nuts off rill nice n' slow."
Apparently Jesse Jackson would like to cut Barack Obama's nuts off. Because you know, Obama is really a bad man, right? Jesse...sorry bro...it's a wrap for you. You LOST ALL of my respect. We've got the first valid, AWESOME amazing non-WASP (mixed) person that has a good shot at being president and you want to cut his nuts off. GTFOHWTBS. Seriously. No, SERIOUSLY. Move to another country, your services are no longer needed here.
I don't use this word often. But Jesse sounded like a real Nigger right there. "massa talkin' dohn to da popl on da fahm, i'mma go cut 'es nuts off rill nice n' slow."
On: Sounding Black and being paid less
Over at my favorite black-pop-hollywood webazine(Stereohyped.com), there was an interesting shock value article from the Freakanomics blog on NYT.com, entitled, "How Much Does It Cost You in Wages if You Sound Black?"
The article opens with, "His main finding: blacks who “sound black” earn salaries that are 10 percent lower than blacks who do not “sound black,” even after controlling for measures of intelligence, experience in the work force, and other factors that influence how much people earn."
'For you go getting all nilly willy silly and ask, "Well WTF does sounding black SOUND like?"
Call a spade a spade. For the most part, you know when you call some customer service line that you are speaking to either a white person or a black person. It's not a bad thing, it just is what it is. You know that traditionally, "sounding black," not only includes a unique venacular, but there are various verbal and non-verbal cues that are present.
By the way "call a spade a spade," is my new cliche for the moment. People always want to argue the "should/could/would," of a situation and ignore the "is/are/be." Sure, I should not think my school is better than yours, but guess what? It is...and I've got empiracle evidence to prove it true.
Read the article - and tell me if you are truly surprised...not at the way that things "should be," but at the way that they are. (I was not surprised in the least).
The article opens with, "His main finding: blacks who “sound black” earn salaries that are 10 percent lower than blacks who do not “sound black,” even after controlling for measures of intelligence, experience in the work force, and other factors that influence how much people earn."
'For you go getting all nilly willy silly and ask, "Well WTF does sounding black SOUND like?"
Call a spade a spade. For the most part, you know when you call some customer service line that you are speaking to either a white person or a black person. It's not a bad thing, it just is what it is. You know that traditionally, "sounding black," not only includes a unique venacular, but there are various verbal and non-verbal cues that are present.
By the way "call a spade a spade," is my new cliche for the moment. People always want to argue the "should/could/would," of a situation and ignore the "is/are/be." Sure, I should not think my school is better than yours, but guess what? It is...and I've got empiracle evidence to prove it true.
Read the article - and tell me if you are truly surprised...not at the way that things "should be," but at the way that they are. (I was not surprised in the least).
7.08.2008
Laws Of Attraction
Sorry y'all I'm probably going to wear this ish out. So one of the basic premises is that you don't simply say "I will, I want, I *future tense*" You have to say something, with conviction in the present tense. I AM, I HAVE, I *ACTION*.
So I get home and walk to the mailbox. I say to myself, "Self, I KNOW there is money in there. I just wonder how much." I did more than say it, I felt it and smiled about it.
I reach in and flip through envelops.
I SHIT YOU NOT, I FOUND A DEPARTMENT OF TREASURY CHECK IN MY MAILBOX.
Except it was addressed to my next door neighbor.
Lesson learned, be as specific as possible about what you want.
So I get home and walk to the mailbox. I say to myself, "Self, I KNOW there is money in there. I just wonder how much." I did more than say it, I felt it and smiled about it.
I reach in and flip through envelops.
I SHIT YOU NOT, I FOUND A DEPARTMENT OF TREASURY CHECK IN MY MAILBOX.
Except it was addressed to my next door neighbor.
Lesson learned, be as specific as possible about what you want.
7.07.2008
If you know this beat, you know where I'm from
Not where the group is from, but where I grew up!
(it's pharcyde over tried by 12). Beat takes me back to highschool. this mix is pretty much the hotness.
Sad thing is my boy who put me on to it - drives me fukkin nuts. He name drops, and self-brags more than I think is attractive. Yes we gotta pat ourselves on the back and be our own biggest promoters, but he pitches to me as if I'm going to donate. He's a friend, we've been through stuff, so of course I support him - so it isn't necessary for him to name drop. I know you and think your cool, just cuz you know him, her or them...it's not going to make you like you more.
*SCREAM* He keeps bringing up marriage. Right, I know ironic given the post right below. Except, I would never feel about him that Diana feels about Jesse. Like we've been on the phone the past 10 minutes, I've done uhhh ohhh okay. But he's so busy name dropping right now that he doesn't even tune into the fact that I'm bored silly as he talks talks talks. *yawn, bore, he's still going.....please make this stop. Maybe I'm not his friend cuz I'm being kinda mean right now, huh? Eeek, he talks about to visit....gosh.
Whew...It's over.
(it's pharcyde over tried by 12). Beat takes me back to highschool. this mix is pretty much the hotness.
Sad thing is my boy who put me on to it - drives me fukkin nuts. He name drops, and self-brags more than I think is attractive. Yes we gotta pat ourselves on the back and be our own biggest promoters, but he pitches to me as if I'm going to donate. He's a friend, we've been through stuff, so of course I support him - so it isn't necessary for him to name drop. I know you and think your cool, just cuz you know him, her or them...it's not going to make you like you more.
*SCREAM* He keeps bringing up marriage. Right, I know ironic given the post right below. Except, I would never feel about him that Diana feels about Jesse. Like we've been on the phone the past 10 minutes, I've done uhhh ohhh okay. But he's so busy name dropping right now that he doesn't even tune into the fact that I'm bored silly as he talks talks talks. *yawn, bore, he's still going.....please make this stop. Maybe I'm not his friend cuz I'm being kinda mean right now, huh? Eeek, he talks about to visit....gosh.
Whew...It's over.
My 4th of July
I left for Philadelphia on Friday, July 4th at 8:30 am. I hadn't been to Philadelphia since grandma passed away, so it was somewhat emotional. As I mentioend below in another post, I was curious about this "Laws of Attraction," talk that had been attracted to me in various different ways. So I stopped by the airport bookstore and picked up a copy of the book.
After reading the first 80 pages, I put the book to practice. I found thanks in the things that I feel good about in my life and thought the things that I would make me happier. So much of my 2008 has been clouded with negativity. I've had quite a few failed relationships and I've dwelled in the negativity of that too long. Using some of the techniques in the book, I shifted my focus to what I want. I want more good people in my life.
So I'm sitting on the plane and the young woman beside me casually asks, "Do they serve drinks on the flight?" Given that I haven't flown US Air in forever, I responded with an I don't know. Conversation went from there and come to find out, this young woman went to my Undergrad, lives about an hour away, but comes to ATL every now and then. We had quite a pleasant conversation, exchanged info and will probably keep in contact.
Essentially my thoughts of being surrounded by good people materialized before my eyes.
Friday I saw John Legend (that's one sexy MOFO, actually he's pretty much my prototype, cept my cousin told me that women aren't quite his type *frown*). However, we got rained out before the fireworks. Saturday I saw Boys II Men perform at Penn's Landing; however we got rained out before the fireworks. Not to mention I had a IBS attack that was so painful it brought me to tears.
We spent Saturday with my cousins who just had twins...they have a quaint spot in Upper Darby. They're in their late 30s, have a 9 year old and just had twins, but still manage to be some cool peoples! I saw what I'd like for myself. They don't have the biggest this, the greatest that...but they have love. And it hasn't always been pretty. But they understand the meaning of marriage and family and it was so beautiful to me. And being around the twins who are only 3 months old made me want more than ever to be a mother. First thing is first of course, I want to be a wife. But being around the family made me reject this notion that I'm doomed to be single because I live in a chocolate city and men just don't want to marry. The men that don't want to marry are not the men for me.
TANGENT: Men that don't want to marry confuse the shit out of me, honestly. In terms of the survival of the fittest concept, not wanting to marry is a form of bloodline suicide. I say all this not in terms of them having a relationship with a woman, but creating an optimal situation to raise children. Granted, dude could contribute to the 70 per cent of black children are born to single mothers statistic. But in a true primal sense; a man is driven to not only spread his seed, but to create a situation in which that seed can survive and spread the seed into future generations. Name one culture on earth in which it is not customary for a man to take on a wife (or something equivalent). The wife takes care of the home and the man provides for his family...because in the primal sense, that is the best way to ensure that his offspring succeed. Hell, I JUST heard a situation in which a 77 year old Indian man wanted a male child so badly that he and his 70 year old wife went through IVF and JUST gave birth to twins, one of which was a son. Clearly his desire to have his blood and name carry on was STRONG.
Anywho, I veered way off track. I felt so positive about The Secret, that I let my sister have it and bought msyelf another copy. It really is no different than Christian Science; however, it's principles based instead of rules based. At times it's hard to stay encouraged through religion because when you fall short you must BEG for mercy to be saved. And when you fall short, it's frustrating to have folks looking at you like, "Hmmm you're going to hell, you know?" Whereas the law of attraction isn't religious per se; it taps into your soul and suggests various thoughts and actions to guide you toward happiness and love. (which is essentially the goal of most religions).
After reading the first 80 pages, I put the book to practice. I found thanks in the things that I feel good about in my life and thought the things that I would make me happier. So much of my 2008 has been clouded with negativity. I've had quite a few failed relationships and I've dwelled in the negativity of that too long. Using some of the techniques in the book, I shifted my focus to what I want. I want more good people in my life.
So I'm sitting on the plane and the young woman beside me casually asks, "Do they serve drinks on the flight?" Given that I haven't flown US Air in forever, I responded with an I don't know. Conversation went from there and come to find out, this young woman went to my Undergrad, lives about an hour away, but comes to ATL every now and then. We had quite a pleasant conversation, exchanged info and will probably keep in contact.
Essentially my thoughts of being surrounded by good people materialized before my eyes.
Friday I saw John Legend (that's one sexy MOFO, actually he's pretty much my prototype, cept my cousin told me that women aren't quite his type *frown*). However, we got rained out before the fireworks. Saturday I saw Boys II Men perform at Penn's Landing; however we got rained out before the fireworks. Not to mention I had a IBS attack that was so painful it brought me to tears.
We spent Saturday with my cousins who just had twins...they have a quaint spot in Upper Darby. They're in their late 30s, have a 9 year old and just had twins, but still manage to be some cool peoples! I saw what I'd like for myself. They don't have the biggest this, the greatest that...but they have love. And it hasn't always been pretty. But they understand the meaning of marriage and family and it was so beautiful to me. And being around the twins who are only 3 months old made me want more than ever to be a mother. First thing is first of course, I want to be a wife. But being around the family made me reject this notion that I'm doomed to be single because I live in a chocolate city and men just don't want to marry. The men that don't want to marry are not the men for me.
TANGENT: Men that don't want to marry confuse the shit out of me, honestly. In terms of the survival of the fittest concept, not wanting to marry is a form of bloodline suicide. I say all this not in terms of them having a relationship with a woman, but creating an optimal situation to raise children. Granted, dude could contribute to the 70 per cent of black children are born to single mothers statistic. But in a true primal sense; a man is driven to not only spread his seed, but to create a situation in which that seed can survive and spread the seed into future generations. Name one culture on earth in which it is not customary for a man to take on a wife (or something equivalent). The wife takes care of the home and the man provides for his family...because in the primal sense, that is the best way to ensure that his offspring succeed. Hell, I JUST heard a situation in which a 77 year old Indian man wanted a male child so badly that he and his 70 year old wife went through IVF and JUST gave birth to twins, one of which was a son. Clearly his desire to have his blood and name carry on was STRONG.
Anywho, I veered way off track. I felt so positive about The Secret, that I let my sister have it and bought msyelf another copy. It really is no different than Christian Science; however, it's principles based instead of rules based. At times it's hard to stay encouraged through religion because when you fall short you must BEG for mercy to be saved. And when you fall short, it's frustrating to have folks looking at you like, "Hmmm you're going to hell, you know?" Whereas the law of attraction isn't religious per se; it taps into your soul and suggests various thoughts and actions to guide you toward happiness and love. (which is essentially the goal of most religions).
7.06.2008
This moved me something deep
my-sexual-assault-is-not-your-political-issue
The last paragraph:
See, the thing is, it's great to say that we should do this or we should do that for the sake of women everywhere. But no one — and especially not other women and supposed feminists — has the right to tell me or any other victim of sexual assault that being victimized and being traumatized leaves us responsible for making the world a better place (as though that's what's accomplished by reporting a rape, actually). We all have a responsibility to try to prevent them, to create a world where they are much more of an exception than the rule, where drunk girls or slutty girls or drunken slutty girls don't have to explain their behavior to anyone — regardless of whether they have been assaulted, or after having been assaulted — and where victims don't have to explain to non-victims the choices they made. My pursuing the prosecution of the one made no more difference in the world than not prosecuting the other. But maybe my talking about them both, maybe helping to ease the stigma of it for other people and create a space where I don't have to be ashamed of being a victim (or of how I chose to deal with that) will.
The last paragraph:
See, the thing is, it's great to say that we should do this or we should do that for the sake of women everywhere. But no one — and especially not other women and supposed feminists — has the right to tell me or any other victim of sexual assault that being victimized and being traumatized leaves us responsible for making the world a better place (as though that's what's accomplished by reporting a rape, actually). We all have a responsibility to try to prevent them, to create a world where they are much more of an exception than the rule, where drunk girls or slutty girls or drunken slutty girls don't have to explain their behavior to anyone — regardless of whether they have been assaulted, or after having been assaulted — and where victims don't have to explain to non-victims the choices they made. My pursuing the prosecution of the one made no more difference in the world than not prosecuting the other. But maybe my talking about them both, maybe helping to ease the stigma of it for other people and create a space where I don't have to be ashamed of being a victim (or of how I chose to deal with that) will.
PSA: Don't Damn me to hell before you know my name
I finally got some inspiration to take my tail to the gym. Afterward, I head to the grocery store and walk by an attractive, tall fellow. We go on about our shopping business, and I'm not going to lie, before I walked out I scanned the place for him - to no avail. As I approach my car, I hear:
"You know you're not suppose to work out on Sunday?"
I smiled and played coy for a second, until I realized that he was dead serious on some Jesus stuff. Like, I'm feeling GREAT about myself cuz I haven't been to the gym in weeks and he wants to try to poop on my parade with some Jesus stuff?
No sir. The way to a woman's (or a person's) heart is not to first damn them to hell. He was super judgmental and I don't prescribe to a straight and narrow path, so I can assure to you that him and I couldn't make it through one date without having a heated argument.
"You know you're not suppose to work out on Sunday?"
I smiled and played coy for a second, until I realized that he was dead serious on some Jesus stuff. Like, I'm feeling GREAT about myself cuz I haven't been to the gym in weeks and he wants to try to poop on my parade with some Jesus stuff?
No sir. The way to a woman's (or a person's) heart is not to first damn them to hell. He was super judgmental and I don't prescribe to a straight and narrow path, so I can assure to you that him and I couldn't make it through one date without having a heated argument.
Halle Berry is the prettiest/sexiest white woman alive
I just want to say that it irritates me to no end when Halle Berry is deemed the “iest -Black Woman,” anything.
Thus the title of this post is no more accurate than calling her the sexiest/prettiest black woman alive.
SHE IS MIXED.
She has several features that are more Euro-centric than Afro-centric and it perpetuates any self-hate that little black girls with less mixed features implicitly take on as they become women.
I can take “iest-Woman,” but IMO, call a spade a spade, she is mixed…50/50. Nobody is saying she’s the prettiest White woman around, thus denying her more Afro-centric qualities.
Furthermore, most of the qualities that deem her to be "pretty," are Euro-centric. This topic is simply not a pill that I swallow with grace.
I'm light because I have white mixture in me. My hair is curly because of that too.
I just want my lil' cousin (the literal and figurative lil' cousin) that's not as light and who doesn't have curly hair like me to truly believe that she is pretty in her own right; however, if she sees Alicia and/or Halle (50/50s) as being the standard of beauty in black America - she's got no chances.
Thus the title of this post is no more accurate than calling her the sexiest/prettiest black woman alive.
SHE IS MIXED.
She has several features that are more Euro-centric than Afro-centric and it perpetuates any self-hate that little black girls with less mixed features implicitly take on as they become women.
I can take “iest-Woman,” but IMO, call a spade a spade, she is mixed…50/50. Nobody is saying she’s the prettiest White woman around, thus denying her more Afro-centric qualities.
Furthermore, most of the qualities that deem her to be "pretty," are Euro-centric. This topic is simply not a pill that I swallow with grace.
I'm light because I have white mixture in me. My hair is curly because of that too.
I just want my lil' cousin (the literal and figurative lil' cousin) that's not as light and who doesn't have curly hair like me to truly believe that she is pretty in her own right; however, if she sees Alicia and/or Halle (50/50s) as being the standard of beauty in black America - she's got no chances.
7.03.2008
Gasonline Price Hedge for everyday consumers
MyGallons.Com allows you to pre-pay for gas and essentially lock that rate in over a period of time. It's honored at several respected gas stations. There is an annual fee; however, if you are risk adverse like me, you like to know how much you are paying up front.
Just though you all should know as an option.
Just though you all should know as an option.
Question - What do you know about the Laws of Attraction?
I had a friend describe it to me about a year ago. It sounded like crazy talk. But then she told me yesterday that sometimes I'm negative. For example, she asserted that at age 26 she'd like to own her home (wheter that be a condo / single family / townhouse ect). But, she's now 24 is back in school, living in LA and in her desired industry people start off making $30k-$40k. Instead of just saying, go for it; I challenged as to why she had this goal. It made sense when she was making $50k+ living in ATL and had the support of her peers who all owned property by age 26. I felt like she used as a standard. Which is great if her path was going to be similar to ours. I pointed all this out to her, and she felt like I was pushing negativity her way. IMO, as a risk adverse person, I was pushing reality on her.
Then she went into the Laws of Attraction concept. Instead of saying, "I'd like to own a house at age 26, despite the cost of living in LA and my piss poor salary," she'd say, "When I own my house at age 26."
So what I'm really chewing on right now is am I negative, or do I infuse my decision making with realities. She knows that if she wants practical advise, she comes to me. When she wants "just do it," advice, I might not be the one. I'll encourage and support her either way; however, I'm there to ask, "how will you eat if all your $ is invested in real estate?"
Question - do you prescribe to the Laws of Attraction? If so, how has this changed your beliefs, life, actions, mindset?
Then she went into the Laws of Attraction concept. Instead of saying, "I'd like to own a house at age 26, despite the cost of living in LA and my piss poor salary," she'd say, "When I own my house at age 26."
So what I'm really chewing on right now is am I negative, or do I infuse my decision making with realities. She knows that if she wants practical advise, she comes to me. When she wants "just do it," advice, I might not be the one. I'll encourage and support her either way; however, I'm there to ask, "how will you eat if all your $ is invested in real estate?"
Question - do you prescribe to the Laws of Attraction? If so, how has this changed your beliefs, life, actions, mindset?
Confession #2
Today is the first day that I contributed to the Obama Campaign, financially. What made me do it? A belief that he can really, really win. And I'm not going to lie, hearing Warren Buffett's remarks on Obama also inspired me.
For the longest time, I had this assumption that all upity older white folks were blind republicans. For instance, my friend made a joke that for all she knows, Warren Buffett could've been John McCain's older brother. So I was so shocked when I heard that he was a supporter of Obama. *Gasp* He truly believes that he should be taxed more than the janitor / teacher / nurse / accountant / lawyer / middle class American.
Let's be real, republicans are in practice are just as "big government," as democrats. So given institutionalized dependency on the government, the real quesiton, as Buffett so eloquently put it, is who funds the government.
Rich republicans are screaming bloody murder somebody is going to raise taxes! If you are making a bunch of money, what is that extra $1 going to do for you? Essentially nothing but feed your greed for more money. Like does the capital gains tax really make sense to be so low? I understand there is an incentive to invest; however, REALLY you get taxed less for doing absolutely NO work than you do on your regular salary, for which you have to put in hours to earn. In having a discussion with my unlikely democrat friend (he's a white, upper class male from Alabama); he pointed out that the motivation for republicans when it comes to taxes is surrounded by the carnal sin of greed.
Nevermind that I'm anti-gun. This new ruling on the second Amendment is asinine. Gun crazy people are now beating their chest asserting that they should have the right to carry concealed weapons into airports. Umm - sorry Mr. NRA, because this is America, the terrorists that has been a law abiding citizen thus far can take a Gun into the airport too.
Nevermind that I'm pro choice. And let's be real, republican men are too. Given that cheating is a common occurrence - imagine the # of illegitimate children of congressmen that would be roaming the earth if Roe vs. Wade is overturned. On a serious note, it's a woman's choice. I don't think it should be birth control; however, there are times when you are dealt a hand of cards that you don't know how to play.
For the longest time, I had this assumption that all upity older white folks were blind republicans. For instance, my friend made a joke that for all she knows, Warren Buffett could've been John McCain's older brother. So I was so shocked when I heard that he was a supporter of Obama. *Gasp* He truly believes that he should be taxed more than the janitor / teacher / nurse / accountant / lawyer / middle class American.
Let's be real, republicans are in practice are just as "big government," as democrats. So given institutionalized dependency on the government, the real quesiton, as Buffett so eloquently put it, is who funds the government.
Rich republicans are screaming bloody murder somebody is going to raise taxes! If you are making a bunch of money, what is that extra $1 going to do for you? Essentially nothing but feed your greed for more money. Like does the capital gains tax really make sense to be so low? I understand there is an incentive to invest; however, REALLY you get taxed less for doing absolutely NO work than you do on your regular salary, for which you have to put in hours to earn. In having a discussion with my unlikely democrat friend (he's a white, upper class male from Alabama); he pointed out that the motivation for republicans when it comes to taxes is surrounded by the carnal sin of greed.
Nevermind that I'm anti-gun. This new ruling on the second Amendment is asinine. Gun crazy people are now beating their chest asserting that they should have the right to carry concealed weapons into airports. Umm - sorry Mr. NRA, because this is America, the terrorists that has been a law abiding citizen thus far can take a Gun into the airport too.
Nevermind that I'm pro choice. And let's be real, republican men are too. Given that cheating is a common occurrence - imagine the # of illegitimate children of congressmen that would be roaming the earth if Roe vs. Wade is overturned. On a serious note, it's a woman's choice. I don't think it should be birth control; however, there are times when you are dealt a hand of cards that you don't know how to play.
7.02.2008
Confession
I'll expound upon this later. But quite frankly, I'm pretty anti-feminist. Not that I think that women shouldn't vote, but I do think that as we move into the work-world, we become less dependent on men, and less nurturing to children.
You can't possibly be *that* mother attending every recital, game ect if you are Ms. Executive who has an important deadline to meet every other week. You can't be the wife who is attentive when you come home after your husband and are already aggrivated from dealing with stingy ass men all day long.
Not that it can't be done. But it'd take an extra-ordinary Company and an extra-ordinary woman with extra-ordinary circumstances. For the common folks, it really is a continuum. And quite frankly, if we are to continue raising good people...somebody has to be nurturing our youth.
Edit #1: When I say Ms. Executive; I'm referring to a C-level person and/or a real mover/shaker in a Company. My background is primarily financial; so I'm not sure if other industries within large Company's work crazy hours (for example, I don't know what the hours are for VP-HR, General Counsel, VP-Marketing). I'm not talking to the Ms. Worker who works a 9-5 (give or take a few hours and crazy hours once in a blue moon). I'd expect that before you met dude you had to hold down a job so that you could shelter/feed/entertain yourself. But say I got married right now and had to take about 2 years off between having two kids. I would be okay with my status / income not growing over that 2 year period and being able to have flexible hours to attend to my childrens' needs first and my job/career's needs second. I've seen one too many women in high power positions put work first and then family. They are very successful women in terms of their career. However, that's not how I define success for me, as a woman. I can honestly say that I don't hold men to that same standard because I saw what my mom and dad did to support their family. He worked longer hours and because of it, got more recognition at work and excelled. He was successful in his role as my father because he brought home the extra $ that allowed me to participate in leagues ect, which my mother drove me to. Make sense? It's late. lol
You can't possibly be *that* mother attending every recital, game ect if you are Ms. Executive who has an important deadline to meet every other week. You can't be the wife who is attentive when you come home after your husband and are already aggrivated from dealing with stingy ass men all day long.
Not that it can't be done. But it'd take an extra-ordinary Company and an extra-ordinary woman with extra-ordinary circumstances. For the common folks, it really is a continuum. And quite frankly, if we are to continue raising good people...somebody has to be nurturing our youth.
Edit #1: When I say Ms. Executive; I'm referring to a C-level person and/or a real mover/shaker in a Company. My background is primarily financial; so I'm not sure if other industries within large Company's work crazy hours (for example, I don't know what the hours are for VP-HR, General Counsel, VP-Marketing). I'm not talking to the Ms. Worker who works a 9-5 (give or take a few hours and crazy hours once in a blue moon). I'd expect that before you met dude you had to hold down a job so that you could shelter/feed/entertain yourself. But say I got married right now and had to take about 2 years off between having two kids. I would be okay with my status / income not growing over that 2 year period and being able to have flexible hours to attend to my childrens' needs first and my job/career's needs second. I've seen one too many women in high power positions put work first and then family. They are very successful women in terms of their career. However, that's not how I define success for me, as a woman. I can honestly say that I don't hold men to that same standard because I saw what my mom and dad did to support their family. He worked longer hours and because of it, got more recognition at work and excelled. He was successful in his role as my father because he brought home the extra $ that allowed me to participate in leagues ect, which my mother drove me to. Make sense? It's late. lol
I heard Warren Buffett speak live today!!!!!
The plantation is pretty awesome at times. Today Warren Buffett came in to address random questions. I didn't bring paper, but I brought pen and ended up taking notes on my hand. He was *that* on point. So here are some take aways:
A woman asked, "I'm 27, you're 77. What advice could you give to me as I enter my 27th year?" Essentially Warren Buffett said that in your early stages of life you can improve upon yourself by being a better communicator. Essentially he indicated that's what seperates a regular person from an extradinary person. We all have the potential to be awesome; however, we must know how to communicate these personal qualities to the world.
Surprisingly, he also indicated that a MAJOR decision of his in life was marriage and who he selected as a spouse. Okay, take a step back. THE RICHEST MAN IN THE WORLD could've answered anything and he said one of his most important / valued decisions was who he married. He marreid at age 20 or 21 and his wife was 19. Another woman put herself on blast and asked as a wife how to best be supportive if you are married to a risk taker. He said that his wife never questioned how much money he would bring home. The only thing she was concerned about is that he was happy doing what he does. That is amazing, and even I fall short of being *that* woman. But at the same time, I think as a woman, we must only have comfort if our man has a passion for what he does and is good at it.
He also indicated that his Heros (what we trivialize by calling them mentors) were his father and a professor Ben Hamliton? He stressed the importance of having the right Heros that encourage you to do the right actions.
Warren Buffett is an Obama supporter. He indicated that 20% of GDP is spent on government items (war, welfare, ect). So given the constant that 20% of GDP, whether it be under democratic or republican rule, the question is who pays for that 20%. He said that he had his employees calculate taxes as a percentage of their pay. He instructed them to include payroll taxes, as we never see them; however, they are paid on our behalf. To his NO suprise, he only paid approximately 17% of taxes while average salary earning employees paid approximately 32% of their earnings back to the government. Essentially, he is a proponent for the redistribution of wealth. That is a humble, honest man speaking. Basically he's saying that all the rich people need to get over themselves and realize that it's not all about *ME or the I.* It's about the US (get it United States).
Next, he indicated that what sets true leaders apart from each other is Passion. Intelligence, Hardwork and Integrity. If one doesn't have Integrity, he hopes that they are dumb and lazy.
Secondly, after listening to the leaders speak on how markets must react to the environment. I think it'd be a good time to make a short-term investment in the warehousing industry. Essentially, gas is too expensive. Warehouses cut the route to market costs.
I'm so going to read a few of his books. He's got me so hype.
Oh and he made at least 4 dirty jokes. I'll attempt to retell the funniest:
A rich wall-street man falls upon hard times. He comes home to his wife and says, "Dear, I'm afriad that I won't be getting a bonus this year or next year. As a result, we're going to have to cut-back. I'm hoping that you could learn how to cook so that we could fire our chef."
Her response, "Okay, If you learn how to make love, we can fire the gardener!"
A woman asked, "I'm 27, you're 77. What advice could you give to me as I enter my 27th year?" Essentially Warren Buffett said that in your early stages of life you can improve upon yourself by being a better communicator. Essentially he indicated that's what seperates a regular person from an extradinary person. We all have the potential to be awesome; however, we must know how to communicate these personal qualities to the world.
Surprisingly, he also indicated that a MAJOR decision of his in life was marriage and who he selected as a spouse. Okay, take a step back. THE RICHEST MAN IN THE WORLD could've answered anything and he said one of his most important / valued decisions was who he married. He marreid at age 20 or 21 and his wife was 19. Another woman put herself on blast and asked as a wife how to best be supportive if you are married to a risk taker. He said that his wife never questioned how much money he would bring home. The only thing she was concerned about is that he was happy doing what he does. That is amazing, and even I fall short of being *that* woman. But at the same time, I think as a woman, we must only have comfort if our man has a passion for what he does and is good at it.
He also indicated that his Heros (what we trivialize by calling them mentors) were his father and a professor Ben Hamliton? He stressed the importance of having the right Heros that encourage you to do the right actions.
Warren Buffett is an Obama supporter. He indicated that 20% of GDP is spent on government items (war, welfare, ect). So given the constant that 20% of GDP, whether it be under democratic or republican rule, the question is who pays for that 20%. He said that he had his employees calculate taxes as a percentage of their pay. He instructed them to include payroll taxes, as we never see them; however, they are paid on our behalf. To his NO suprise, he only paid approximately 17% of taxes while average salary earning employees paid approximately 32% of their earnings back to the government. Essentially, he is a proponent for the redistribution of wealth. That is a humble, honest man speaking. Basically he's saying that all the rich people need to get over themselves and realize that it's not all about *ME or the I.* It's about the US (get it United States).
Next, he indicated that what sets true leaders apart from each other is Passion. Intelligence, Hardwork and Integrity. If one doesn't have Integrity, he hopes that they are dumb and lazy.
Secondly, after listening to the leaders speak on how markets must react to the environment. I think it'd be a good time to make a short-term investment in the warehousing industry. Essentially, gas is too expensive. Warehouses cut the route to market costs.
I'm so going to read a few of his books. He's got me so hype.
Oh and he made at least 4 dirty jokes. I'll attempt to retell the funniest:
A rich wall-street man falls upon hard times. He comes home to his wife and says, "Dear, I'm afriad that I won't be getting a bonus this year or next year. As a result, we're going to have to cut-back. I'm hoping that you could learn how to cook so that we could fire our chef."
Her response, "Okay, If you learn how to make love, we can fire the gardener!"
7.01.2008
When mirrors aren't available, ask somebody
So this what somebody had to say about me: Well as far as that goes you have MILF written all over you. haha you will always be that fine ass mom everybody wants to know a little better. but for real, I think you are very smart and that you have your career on lock and now you want to focus more on obtaining the same amount of success in the relationship field. You know who you are as a person and you know what you bring to the table and wont settle for anything less than a real man who knows how to keep up with a woman like you.
Pretty accurate assessment.
Pretty accurate assessment.
You ever have a day where you KNOW God used you as the comedy
channel.
Because somebody has got to be laughing at you to make this day worth it.
My co-worker buddy is admiring my blackberry. He's got one, but it's not the curve and he's amazed at how much smaller mine is. Then he proceeds to add himself to my black berry messenger contact list. Dude is real cool, is probably my best guy friend at work...we have a really candid relationship. In the middle of him trying to add himself to my contact list, I get the following message:
You must have used BOB last night and the O was so intense it knocked you out.
MORTIFIED, EMBARRASSED - all the while, it was kind of funny, so I couldn't help but to laugh.
My coworker laughs, and continues to tell him all about this wonderful guy Bob that I've been dating. Snark snark snark.
Because somebody has got to be laughing at you to make this day worth it.
My co-worker buddy is admiring my blackberry. He's got one, but it's not the curve and he's amazed at how much smaller mine is. Then he proceeds to add himself to my black berry messenger contact list. Dude is real cool, is probably my best guy friend at work...we have a really candid relationship. In the middle of him trying to add himself to my contact list, I get the following message:
You must have used BOB last night and the O was so intense it knocked you out.
MORTIFIED, EMBARRASSED - all the while, it was kind of funny, so I couldn't help but to laugh.
My coworker laughs, and continues to tell him all about this wonderful guy Bob that I've been dating. Snark snark snark.
6.29.2008
Race Observations
So this whole Kickball thing has me thinking. Again, I was "the only one." That was the scenario all through elementary school, one of 5 in middle school and still the minority in high school. Back to one of a handful in college, the work world. So it's not a foreign feeling; however, it's still uncomfortable at times...for me; perhaps not for those around me.
But then I got to thinking...black people don't DO things...at least not in ATL. You have a handful of those that are active in the community; however, the general population don't do much other than go to the club and get drunk. *sigh* - been there done that.
There are kickball, softball, soccer, ect leagues all over the city that I was blind to until recently. There is a separate black alumni group; however, they don't participate in any leagues. The Atlanta Urban League for young professionals has a health conscious committee that can barely get together 2 people to do a walk around piedmont park on Saturday mornings.
Then I got to thinking, white folks talk about going "to the lake," on the weekends, playing sports etc. All this stuff, I truly enjoy and miss from my youth. Not that I want to divorce my 'blackness' but I truly don't get it. I hate that I feel like in order to enjoy certain things, I need to be "the only one."
In other words. All I want in this life is to be cared for the way I want to care for another person. Eek - I'm feeling sappy and personal. Is it *that time of month?*
But then I got to thinking...black people don't DO things...at least not in ATL. You have a handful of those that are active in the community; however, the general population don't do much other than go to the club and get drunk. *sigh* - been there done that.
There are kickball, softball, soccer, ect leagues all over the city that I was blind to until recently. There is a separate black alumni group; however, they don't participate in any leagues. The Atlanta Urban League for young professionals has a health conscious committee that can barely get together 2 people to do a walk around piedmont park on Saturday mornings.
Then I got to thinking, white folks talk about going "to the lake," on the weekends, playing sports etc. All this stuff, I truly enjoy and miss from my youth. Not that I want to divorce my 'blackness' but I truly don't get it. I hate that I feel like in order to enjoy certain things, I need to be "the only one."
In other words. All I want in this life is to be cared for the way I want to care for another person. Eek - I'm feeling sappy and personal. Is it *that time of month?*
6.28.2008
A bit of this, that and the other.
1. Kickball is awesome already. It is kind of awkward being the "only," one again. They expect me to be athletically inclined, which I kind of am. What I found the most random is that upon saying, Hello my name is SunFresh to this one gal, she responded, "you're so pretty." I was kind of like err uhhh...thank you. We had some random conversation on the meaning of names, and I said that I didn't know what my name meant. So today I see her and she smiles and says, "Rich, your name means rich...so what are you rich in?" It was kind of awkward in a thoughtful way. I kind of think that she's hitting on me, but then I might just be feeling myself too much.
2. Young Fellow. I'm falling back on it. I have a tendency to fall for a person very quickly, and then take a practical, thoughtful approach to a person. We get along really well and enjoy company, but as I listen to him, I hear a jaded, bitter person that has built up walls that I don't know if I can climb. . I can honestly say my ego/confidence takes a blow in regards to him. His first love was a model. I could sit here and say that I'm uber confident and sure of myself, but that'd be a cold-blooded lie. When you date, you don't necessarily want the next one to not be as attractive as the first. Our conversation led me to believe that he's waiting to find the model chic + my personality. Ummm. Ok. I'm not an ugly woman, and I get my due attention; however, unlike his ex, you won't see my face in advertisements at your local mall.
2. Young Fellow. I'm falling back on it. I have a tendency to fall for a person very quickly, and then take a practical, thoughtful approach to a person. We get along really well and enjoy company, but as I listen to him, I hear a jaded, bitter person that has built up walls that I don't know if I can climb. . I can honestly say my ego/confidence takes a blow in regards to him. His first love was a model. I could sit here and say that I'm uber confident and sure of myself, but that'd be a cold-blooded lie. When you date, you don't necessarily want the next one to not be as attractive as the first. Our conversation led me to believe that he's waiting to find the model chic + my personality. Ummm. Ok. I'm not an ugly woman, and I get my due attention; however, unlike his ex, you won't see my face in advertisements at your local mall.
6.27.2008
Ladies...Question:
For real, how important is money?
Say you find somebody that you are completely compatible with; however, you know that you'd be the breadwinner in the relationship. He has a job, and lives decently, but you make more than $30,000 than him. During dating, you are okay with this because you truly enjoy his company and the non-monetary investments that he contributes to the relationship.
Marriage is on the horizon and you think...hmmm, I could not jump out of the work force to raise children with him and maintain the same standard of living.
Is this a deterent? Is that gold-diggerish. (IMO gold diggerish is wanting materialistic gifts/favors...whereas considering if he could support the family is a practical risk assessment). Gosh, sometimes being an accountant works against me.
Say you find somebody that you are completely compatible with; however, you know that you'd be the breadwinner in the relationship. He has a job, and lives decently, but you make more than $30,000 than him. During dating, you are okay with this because you truly enjoy his company and the non-monetary investments that he contributes to the relationship.
Marriage is on the horizon and you think...hmmm, I could not jump out of the work force to raise children with him and maintain the same standard of living.
Is this a deterent? Is that gold-diggerish. (IMO gold diggerish is wanting materialistic gifts/favors...whereas considering if he could support the family is a practical risk assessment). Gosh, sometimes being an accountant works against me.
6.25.2008
I love my moms
My mom hasn't been exposed to a lot. So I am so tickled when she is and reports on it.
First it was the question about squirting. Dag on internet - She was listening to a podcast and the speaker mentioned this " phenomenon. "
Next our experience at the "clothing optional" beach.
Now...first thing this morning I get a text, "I went to a gay bar for the first time ever. Silly me - I asked, "where is the ladies room?" (the restrooms were coed.) I asked her if she had fun. "Had Loads of Fun."
She went with her gay-boyfriend who sang in her wedding. (gay boyfriend is just a good friend that is gay). I'm happy that she's being exposed to various things.
I'm just working on getting her over to Europe now.
First it was the question about squirting. Dag on internet - She was listening to a podcast and the speaker mentioned this " phenomenon. "
Next our experience at the "clothing optional" beach.
Now...first thing this morning I get a text, "I went to a gay bar for the first time ever. Silly me - I asked, "where is the ladies room?" (the restrooms were coed.) I asked her if she had fun. "Had Loads of Fun."
She went with her gay-boyfriend who sang in her wedding. (gay boyfriend is just a good friend that is gay). I'm happy that she's being exposed to various things.
I'm just working on getting her over to Europe now.
Perception vs. Reality....Black vs. White
So This Story is spreading like a wild fire in the office.
To recap. A Korean girl called her white co-worker a "dumb white dude from BumbleFuck, Southern State."
He did not want to report it.
I respected his decision; however, I felt like management should be aware of the situation in the event that Korean girl acted crazy on other issues. I specifically said, White man doesn't want anything to come of this; it's more of a 1st time shame on you 2nd time shame on me type situation. We handled it, Korean girl hasn't said anything inappropriate in a racial regard (but she has said inappropriate stuff to other people). The manager knew all the people, as she was on site for 3 days. She also happened to be black.
The way that the other white people are perceiving the situation is that
Nothing was done because one black told another black.
The reality: Nothing was done because a white didn't want for anything to happen.
The system works for anybody that would like to use it. And don't look at me like the Angry Black Woman when you fail to use the system.
see more pwn and owned pictures
I'm irritated. I was on such a high this morning from The Date. He he, as I turned my thoughts to him, I started to smile.
How about I brought in the following CD's to enhance my amorous mood:
Avant - Private Room
Brian McKnight - Anytime
Floetry - Flo'Ology Mixtape Sampler
Amerie - Touch
Beyonce - Bday
To recap. A Korean girl called her white co-worker a "dumb white dude from BumbleFuck, Southern State."
He did not want to report it.
I respected his decision; however, I felt like management should be aware of the situation in the event that Korean girl acted crazy on other issues. I specifically said, White man doesn't want anything to come of this; it's more of a 1st time shame on you 2nd time shame on me type situation. We handled it, Korean girl hasn't said anything inappropriate in a racial regard (but she has said inappropriate stuff to other people). The manager knew all the people, as she was on site for 3 days. She also happened to be black.
The way that the other white people are perceiving the situation is that
Nothing was done because one black told another black.
The reality: Nothing was done because a white didn't want for anything to happen.
The system works for anybody that would like to use it. And don't look at me like the Angry Black Woman when you fail to use the system.
see more pwn and owned pictures
I'm irritated. I was on such a high this morning from The Date. He he, as I turned my thoughts to him, I started to smile.
How about I brought in the following CD's to enhance my amorous mood:
Avant - Private Room
Brian McKnight - Anytime
Floetry - Flo'Ology Mixtape Sampler
Amerie - Touch
Beyonce - Bday
The DATE
Wow. I mean WOW.
and on a different note. I recognize that dude ain't perfect...as in his "resume" ain't the best. Ex had a great resume, but left me unfulfilled. This dude's resume is a bit less than stellar; however, there are no gaps in the emotional connection thus far. I see potential in him.
And he invited me to his basketball game...how cute is that? He plays in some organized recreational league...I'mma go tomorrow and cheer him on.
He is so opposite of what I'm used to. It's so refreshing. I can breathe a sigh of relief.
and on a different note. I recognize that dude ain't perfect...as in his "resume" ain't the best. Ex had a great resume, but left me unfulfilled. This dude's resume is a bit less than stellar; however, there are no gaps in the emotional connection thus far. I see potential in him.
And he invited me to his basketball game...how cute is that? He plays in some organized recreational league...I'mma go tomorrow and cheer him on.
He is so opposite of what I'm used to. It's so refreshing. I can breathe a sigh of relief.
6.24.2008
Associates (c) Greg Real World Hollywood
Interestingly enough, the definition of Associate per dictionary.com was more liberal than I thought it would be. But what best captures the distinction between a friend and an associate is: having subordinate status; without full rights and privileges. Friend was defined as "a person you know well and regard with affection and trust"
There is a lot more to this that won't go on blogosphere. But basically, today is a one in which I saw that a friend needs to be called an associate.
There is a lot more to this that won't go on blogosphere. But basically, today is a one in which I saw that a friend needs to be called an associate.
Confession
I'm giddy about this new guy. I'll call him Borders. We met Friday night. His initial approach was all wrong and oh-so-typical. But as we continued talking, he felt more like a friend, instead of a dude that was trying to sleep with me. And typically I shy away from uber attractive people b/c they have some sense of entitlement. He recognizes that he's attractive, but he values his personality even more. He's excitable. I'm pretty calm and laid back, he's like a rambunctious little kid. He likes to lay out the world as he sees it (expectations). Like last night we had a conversation about "phone etiquette." As simple as it was, it's nice to understand what one perceives as polite and rude. He makes me laugh. He makes me talk. We talked 5 hours one night and 2.5 the next. I told him, I can't sustain that because I need sleep, but I thoroughly enjoy chatting it up with him. I'm trying to "play coy" and wait until he invites me out to do something...but quite frankly I want to see him again to make sure that my drunk eye wasn't working. I want to make sure that he finds me attractive.
Whatever, I might suggest to him that we meet up at Starbucks and or Borders for a mini date. (plus I want to feel up on his big burly biceps). I'm not into games...if he's taken aback by my forwardness - then he's not the one for me anyway.
Whatever, I might suggest to him that we meet up at Starbucks and or Borders for a mini date. (plus I want to feel up on his big burly biceps). I'm not into games...if he's taken aback by my forwardness - then he's not the one for me anyway.
6.23.2008
In the spirit of George Carlin (R.I.P.)
Friday I met a young attractive fellow. Our first conversation was great. He secretly slipped out that he's somewhat of a conspiracy theorist. After listening to him skim the surface of some of his curiosities, I asked, "have you watched Zeitgeist?" His eyes got big and he felt like he hit the jackpot in me.
I was taken aback because usually young (28) hot guys don't hold my interest. I was adament in not putting out good time girl vibes, and I let him know...I'm not out here looking for "a good time." I want to get to know people and see if we are compatible. Well, we spent 5 hours talking on the phone last night, which is something I haven't done since I was in high school.
Most interesting is our view on religion. He first directed to a George Carlin clip on youtube which summarized his overall question about religion. Essentially, "So you want me to believe that there is a invincible man in the sky..." I found his views on religion to be even more interesting becasue contrary to me, he grew up going to church every Sunday. But we both concur that there is a lot to be questioned about religion (Christianity).
The following movie, Zeitgeist, is a conspiracy theorists dream movie. It is broken up into 3 parts 1) Religion 2) 9/11 and 3) Federal Reserve.
The religious part outlines the fact that Jesus was not the first figure to be born of a virgin...essentially the story of Jesus is borrowed from other religions / mythical stories. I don't think it's a coincidence that the Jesus is the "son" of God and the Sun used to be the most respected/worshiped physical object observed by those on earth. Most people are brought up in a church and discouraged from asking quesitons about religion. I've come to accept that my concept of faith is saying..."I may not believe in the literal sense of many things, but there is a powerful story with powerful lessons."
I'd suggest that you play the video in the background (listening to headphones). The first 10-15 minutes are pretty slow. Actually I suggest going straight to the 14th minute, as that's where the questioning first starts. If you watch between the 14th and 25th minute - really...what is your reaction? Did you already know some of that information? Do you think these things are coincidence?
I was taken aback because usually young (28) hot guys don't hold my interest. I was adament in not putting out good time girl vibes, and I let him know...I'm not out here looking for "a good time." I want to get to know people and see if we are compatible. Well, we spent 5 hours talking on the phone last night, which is something I haven't done since I was in high school.
Most interesting is our view on religion. He first directed to a George Carlin clip on youtube which summarized his overall question about religion. Essentially, "So you want me to believe that there is a invincible man in the sky..." I found his views on religion to be even more interesting becasue contrary to me, he grew up going to church every Sunday. But we both concur that there is a lot to be questioned about religion (Christianity).
The following movie, Zeitgeist, is a conspiracy theorists dream movie. It is broken up into 3 parts 1) Religion 2) 9/11 and 3) Federal Reserve.
The religious part outlines the fact that Jesus was not the first figure to be born of a virgin...essentially the story of Jesus is borrowed from other religions / mythical stories. I don't think it's a coincidence that the Jesus is the "son" of God and the Sun used to be the most respected/worshiped physical object observed by those on earth. Most people are brought up in a church and discouraged from asking quesitons about religion. I've come to accept that my concept of faith is saying..."I may not believe in the literal sense of many things, but there is a powerful story with powerful lessons."
I'd suggest that you play the video in the background (listening to headphones). The first 10-15 minutes are pretty slow. Actually I suggest going straight to the 14th minute, as that's where the questioning first starts. If you watch between the 14th and 25th minute - really...what is your reaction? Did you already know some of that information? Do you think these things are coincidence?
6.22.2008
Dating SUCKS ASS - But Martin Luther is the best.
Yesterday I heard that my favorite male artist was performing in the city (as seen above). Figo and I had plans to watch a movie; however, I let him know that there was a change in plans for our date. He was game. Figo is the 35 year old who I met at work. Not the cutest; however, conversation is good and quite frankly, he makes me feel special.
So he takes me a nice restaurant. I'm carrying the conversation, which starts to annoy me. We move onto the topic of favorite things to eat / cook.
I tell a story about how I survived on Omelettes for 2 weeks when I first moved to ATL, therefore I take pride in cooking them.
He's like I have a story about Omelettes. ...he goes on to tell me about how he travels to Africa for work frequently and has to be careful about what he eats b/c his digestive system is sensitive.
Cool so far...right?
Then he says how one late midnight, he's reviewing the menu and sees an Omelette. He orders it. He eats its.
You ready for this????
"I ate it, and it made me have such a good BM that I ordered it 3 nights in a row."
SunFresh: Smiles politely, thinks...WTF did this fool just tell me that an omelette made him shit really good? Yes, this will be our last date.
The concert was wonderful. Martin Luther's voice is like hot chocolate on a cold winter day - it simply soothes the soul. AND he's sexier than a muffukka. Seriously, he is. The venue was really small and I was sitting in the front-center, so I know he saw me rocking out to his music. There is one song that he sang that used to bring me to tears because the lyrics hit me just right:
"Sometimes I want to feel like I'm the one in control. Take back every element of me that they stole. I'll be fine when I heal my mind body and soul. Until then take your time and make sure that you do it riiiiiight. Make your moves knowing that God is on our siiiiiide." (When you have a bad job...those lyrics fit the bill perfectly)
I got a picture with him.
Also, Kelly Love Jones performed. Look her up. I thoroughly enjoyed her music as well, I bought her CD right there at the concert.
Lastly, really...my stride was so STANK last night. My outfit was so HOT that random people on the street handed me compliments. I feel like I wasted a GREAT outfit. I will have to recycle that outfit and give it to the masses to be appreciated.
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