So I realized my voice just got an octave higher

when he called.

I've approached this dating thing somewhat haphazardly. My mind says, "SunFresh...get out there to meet somebody so that you can start the process of having a relationship so that you can get married within the next 3-5 years." But my heart has been on some, "Woman, give me a rest...I've been beaten this year." So that manifests itself in me hanging out with people, enjoying their company, but not feeling a guy pluck at my heart strings. And not really allowing myself to be open to that.

Well dag on it...the body never lies. When I talk to him, I've got a dumb ass smile on my face, my thoughts get jumbled, voice gets an octave higher. Two weeks ago, I was kind of like...ehhhh take it or leave. He's cute, but I'm not sure.

Well today, I found myself really looking forward to interaction with him. He offered to take me to the airport for my flight tomorrow. To me, this is about the nicest, most comforting gesture. I typically drive myself to the airport and hate breaking down in vulnerability to ask anybody...especially at inconvenient times. Plus, he lives on the West Side of town, I live on the east AND I've got to be at the airport at 8:00, so he's going to forfeit sleep for me.

Last night, our 4th date, was the first time that I kind of let my hair down. I wore the jeans, wore the hair curly, danced around and sang my heart out to 80s rock, 90s rap and 00s hip-hop. All I know is that I was having fun.

Before I left the house, I internally decided that I was open to a kiss; not a tongue soap opera kiss, but a quick and sweet union of the lips. So as the night came to a close, I was nervous. We embraced...a good tight one, the one where you're slightly on your toes, face nuzzled in his neck and arms holding on as if you're about to fall...like fall. Quick & sweet.

I haven't fallen, but I've definitely tripped.