Double Standards and Maybe Lying Ain't So Bad After Alll

Yes. There is a double standard. Follow me as I make an example out of straight porn. Porn to men what soap operas are to women...exaggerated wishful thinking ways of how life is supposed to go down.

So in porn, a woman is fucked. Ladies and gents - re-read that - she is fucked. Not made love to, not sexed. She might even yell out "fuck me!" She's screaming and hollering, most of the time it appears that she is in pain, making stupid ass faces, we never know if she really climaxes; however, we're well aware when he does cuz he likes to decorate her face with his man-power. There is nothing soft, gentle, caring about it.

Now as a woman, if porn represents a man's glorified idea of sex...WHY IN TARNATION would I want a man that played that role...the role of being fucked? Or even inflicting the fuck onto another man? So absolutely, there is a double-standard IMO. Women don't naturally play the role of the aggressor, the fuck-or, if you will.

And really...if you gave me a no-other-option-choice to be man-powered in the rear-end vs. kissing a woman...I'd choose kissing a woman. I'd consider myself otherwise "exploratory..." you can go near it, around it, tickle it - but not IN it. First, I've got an alternative entry that is much better equipped - it doesn't rip or tear...it expands to fit like a glove. Second - I try to avoid dirt. Why would somebody purposely step in a muddy puddle? Even if it dried up on a sunny day...next time it rains, it still a muddy puddle.

Then this other dialogue between Bad Guy and Aonmyous got me to thinking that people REALLY don't want to know the truth. I feel like the Joker for saying that...but it's kind of along the lines of...every body is calm when things go according to plan...even when the plan is disastrous.

In one corner we had Bad Guy (who is actually just Hurt/Jaded Guy) who had dreams of political office, and was dating his potential-Cindy McCain. So imagine his surprise when he found out that his potential-wifey had a past...she was in a relationship with a woman in college. (I used Cindy McCain b/c she too had a past...she stole from a non-for-profit that she was on the board to do drugs).

Other corner we have Anonymous who told a guy up front that she had a relationship with a woman in the past, but that was her past. Despite knowing her past, the guy continued seriously dating her...then after a considerable amount of time said it was a deal breaker.

Imagine if Bad/Hurt/Jaded Guy never found out the truth. Ehh, and let's say he wasn't a politician cuz EVERYthing comes to light when your in the public eye. Okay, so say he never found out...got married. Had 2.5 kids, a dog, a fish, a nice 401k, a loving wife. Uhhh...crickets...what's the problem in this situation? Say anonymous omitted the truth about the past. He wouldn't have found out. They would've had 2.5 kids, a dog, a fish and a nice 401k...a loving marriage. Uhhh...crickets....what's the problem in this situation?

What if I lied to my ex about kinda-bad thing I did, despite the fact that we were broken up? Uhhh...crickets...we would've been friendly n' cordial. What I did had no bearing on our future in the context of a committed relationship...b/c there was no future there. So why didn't I lie?

IMO, it's like when a guy asks how many men you've slept with in the past. What is he trying to get at? If I answer 4 instead of 3 am I a whore? If I said 100 before Jesus, and then 0 after I got saved...am I a whore? If I did 10 while I was young and stupid and then 2 over the most recent 3 year period...am I a whore? Really, a dude should just ask if she's been tested. That's the one thing that is relevant to his future. There are other cues to figure out if she's wifey material. If she's dancing on the bar counter with a mini-skirt...not so wifey. If she accidentally calls you Bob instead of Brad...not so wifey.